Je suis bourré!

When you go out with friends and you are having a “few” drinks, and the world around you is starting to spin, you want to be able to say that you have passed the state of tipsy (= pompette) and that now you are properly drunk. I’m just giving you some slang and some expressions to say when you are drunk. And watch out there are a lot!!!

The traditional!

raide = hammered

pété = smashed

beurré, bourré, fait = wasted

défoncé, pulvérisé, anéanti = annihilated

raide = trashed

explosé = blasted

eméché = obliterated

carpette, fracassé, pinté, cuité, rond, défracté, pompette, enfraqué, défait, détruit, etc.

And some expressions :

Je me traîne. (I am dragging myself.)

Je suis cuit. (I am cooked.)

Je rame. (I am rowing, like in a boat.)

Je suis sec. (I am dry.)

J’ai la tête en vrac. (My head is upside down.)

Je suis en vrac. (I am in a jumble.)

Je suis chiffon. (I am a rag.)

Je suis fait. (I am done.)

Je suis mort. (I am dead.)

Je suis envoyé. (I am sent.)

Je suis dans le vague. (I am in space.)

Je suis gris. (I am gray.)

Je me suis mis minable. (I made myself miserable.)

Je me suis mis la misère. (I put myself into misery.)

Je me la suis collé. (I brought it onto myself.)

Je m'en suis collé une belle. (“I stuck a good one on myself.”)

Je suis plein. (I am loaded.)

Je me suis foutu une bonne raclée. (“I slapped myself very well.”)

Je m’en suis envoyé/mis plein la figure.Je me suis mis la mine(I got shit-faced.)

Je suis jaune. (“I am yellow.” This refers to the fact that in the early stages of cirrhosis, when the liver is saturated with alcohol, you start to turn yellow.)

J'ai une armée de bikers dans le crâne. (I have an army of bikers in my head.)

J’ai le 14 juillet dans mon crâne. (I have the 14th of July in my head.)

Ma graduation est très visible. (My degradation is visible.)

C'est la fête de la bière dans mon verre. (It’s Oktober Fest in my glass.)

J’ai les amygdales qui baignent. (My tonsils are swimming.) (When you have drunk too much and you are feeling full.)

Je suis terminé. (I am terminated.)

J'ai la boite crânienne abîmée. (My skull is damaged.)

Y’a comme un attentat dans ma tête. (there is like a bombing in my head.)

Y’a comme un arrière goût jusque sous mes paupières. ( There is like an after taste up to my eyelids.)

Putain il a morflé. (F @*% he got banged up.)

Je suis fracassé. ( I am smashed.)

J'ai le foie monté a l'envers. (I have my liver upside down.)

J'ai les cheveux qui poussent à l'envers. (My hair is growing backwards)

Dans le jus!

Since I moved to London my life has become crazy. Always running to catch a train, going out to meet up with friends, working etc. In short extremely busy. So…

“je suis dans le jus!!!!!!”

It basically means: to be in trouble, to be overloaded or to be unable to cope with your work. But strangely enough “avoir du jus” means to have a lot of energy. Interesting, isn’t it?

We also have to keep in mind that “jus“aka “juice”, is what you get when you squeeze fruit! Duhhhhh (Tell me something I don’t know, right!) but that also echoes to the other French expression “être pressé” (to be in a hurry).

In the restaurant business -I can relate to this since I used to be a waiter when I was a student- you will hear that saying a lot. So it won’t be surprising to see a cook who has a bunch of plates waiting to be picked up, comes out of the kitchen to yell:

"Magnez-vous le cul les serveurs ou vous allez être dans le jus" (Waiters, move your asses or you’re gonna be swamped!)

In slang, “jus” also means electricity (like "juice" in a battery), so in French “courant”. So sometimes instead of saying “tiens-moi au courant” (keep in touch) you can also say …

“tiens-moi au jus!”

Donc tout le monde est au jus maintenant?

Many ways to say someone is eye candy

I was hanging out with a friend of mine and we were out clubbing. At some point, my friend spotted a really good-looking girl and said « Putain, c’est un avion de chasse celle-là ! ». I burst out laughing and I said that I hadn’t heard that expression in a very long time. So it gave me the idea to blog about it. Slang is really strong when it comes describing someone’s physical attributes. We sometimes use really funny metaphors. Here are the ones I can remember so far...

T’as vus celle-là, elle est bien tankée ! (have you seen that one, she’s a knock out--complimenting on her physical assets)

C’est un bloc (he or she is a block)

Elle me fait tripper! (she amazes me!)

Cette fille c’est un avion de chasse ! (this girl is really good looking)

Avion de chasse = fighter plane

C’est une bombe/bombe atomique (that’s a bomb)

T’as vu elle ! Elle est trop bonne/C'est une Bonnasse! (did you see her ? She’s really gorgeous -- a bit vulgar too, it also means that she looks like a good lay)

Il est canon (he’s stunning) --that refers to the canons of beauty in drawing.

Il déchire ! (He’s drop-dead gorgeous)

Lui c’est un beau gosse (Cf : BG)

Beau Cul Belle Gueule! ( based on "BCBG = Bon Chic Bon Genre" which is used to describe a classy/sophisticated/preppy person but here they use it as a pun "Nice ass Pretty face")

Elle est (super,hyper...) mimi ( She is super cute)

Il est à tomber! (he's to die for)

Now a bit risqué!!!!!

Si elle était dans mon lit j'irais pas dormir dans la baignoire! (if she were in my bed I wouldn't sleep in the bathtub)

elle a les yeux qui crient braguette! (Her eyes are looking for lust or she is DTF)

braguette= fly on a pants

*Most of these expressions apply to men or woman--except "Elle est trop bonne" et "Lui c’est un beau gosse".